“I want to sit on the white couch”
she said with an intensity that was palatable. It was our first meeting and we sat across from each other at the coffee shop. I was impressed with her drive and willingness to go all in with her new business. I had no idea though what she meant by white couch.
As we moved deeper into our conversation, I learned that at her company’s annual conference the elite members sit in white chairs in the front row with a white couch on the stage. She wanted my help in coaching her to the ranks of the “white couch people.”
It wasn’t simply a measure of financial success or even the allure of being a top producing salesperson. This was different and I completely understood. It was my story, too. As a midlife woman it was an opportunity to reach a lofty goal on our own. To accomplish something that was outside the realm of motherhood and wifedom. Beyond being the support person behind every family member. Outside of helping everyone in your world achieve success while wondering if that was even possible for you. Then not feeling guilty for thinking it.
This was a deeply seated desire to link arms with your God and do something that you believe in so strongly that you’re willing to burn-the-boats and go all in. Sitting on the white couch was simply the carrot dangling just out of reach that would lead the way.
As we started working together we coined the phrase “a white couch moment” to celebrate a win that was getting us closer to attaining a dream. It makes such a visual impact!
A few months ago, I experienced my own personal “white couch moment.” It was my first keynote speech. Knowing that God had been tugging at my heart to share my stories for years, this event was a milestone for me. To make it even better, it happened to fall on my birthday weekend. The year prior I had received news on my birthday that my autoimmune disease was back in full force. Among other things I had struggled with losing my hair and all the new awkwardness that brought with it.
But instead of retreating back in defeat, it brought a fierceness to what I knew God was calling me to do. There was no backing down.
I opened my hands and released it all to God and asked him to use me as a willing vessel. This was not easy as I was pretty attached to my hair and my looks. There were days when I would look into the mirror and wonder who was looking back at me. How did my husband REALLY feel when he looked at this new version of me?
I went down other rabbit holes, too. I questioned if all my work was even making an impact. Did anyone even care? It was a true pity party! I seemed to have more and more of them as we got closer to speaking day. Have you ever been there?
On the day of the event, imagine when I walked into that room and saw the stage for the first time. Sitting front and center was the most beautiful white couch. I was overwhelmed with the goodness of God that he would allow me to have my own “white couch moment” after such a hard year. It was a reminder that the woman God saw when he looked at me, had nothing to do with my hair or looks. He cared about my willing heart.
That is how God works. God tells the prophet Jeremiah, “Before I formed you in the womb I KNEW you. Before you were even born I set you apart …” Jeremiah 1:5
And what about the beautiful words of Psalm 139:15-16 “…My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.”
I find it comforting to know that God already knows our “white couch moments”. I’ve heard them called “God Glimpses” into who he’s created us to be. Before we were even a twinkle in our parents’ eyes – He KNEW YOU! He KNEW ME! He knew all the steps we would take, the countless failures and mishaps. He knew our dreams, in fact he planted them within us.
He has already equipped us from birth with EVERYTHING needed to accomplish his purpose within our life. He knew that we would become discouraged and defeated along the way. Encountering one of these moments is a beacon on our journey to living out what he already knows we can accomplish if we don’t give up. It is a “God Wink” that we are on the right path.
It’s also important to remember that these “white couch moments” are indeed moments. A point in time when God briefly pulls back the curtain and says, “Here you go! This is where I see you going!” It’s a mountain top experience that we can tuck into our back pocket and hold onto as we go back to the trenches and continue our work. I desperately need this sometimes! I need to know that there’s an ultimate God ordained purpose to the hard labor that takes place in the valleys. I’m so thankful that my Lord knows that about me and I can trust that He will provide
white couch moments at the exact moment that I need them.
Going back to my client who first came to me with her dream. I have watched her work in the trenches. She has been learning and growing with great intensity. Applying her hands to the task, God allowed me to have a front row seat in watching a beautiful woman lean into her God appointed purpose. I’ve seen her achieve “white couch moments” along the way and I know there are many more to come. As a coach that’s the most beautiful God glimpse of all!
